The following is a partial reconstruction of an email thread between Claire Voss, 29, and an account registered under the name of Marcus Hale. Marcus Hale died in 2017. Claire Voss reported the correspondence to police in January 2023 and has not made further public statements.
HR
From: Claire Voss
To: m.hale.1993@gmail.com
Subject: just checking
Date: November 3, 2023
Marcus,
I know this is insane and your account is probably hacked or has been taken over by some spam bot. I know that. But it's been six years and I still haven't fully — anyway.
I just wanted to write something to this address. For me, not for you. You're not reading it.
C
HR
From: m.hale.1993@gmail.com
To: Claire Voss
Subject: RE: just checking
Date: November 3, 2023 — 11:58 PM
Claire.
I read it.
How is your mother's garden? The one she moved after the frost killed the dahlias. Did she plant the hydrangeas where she said she would?
M
HR
Claire's hands, she later said, were shaking when she typed the response. Her mother had moved the garden in August. She had told no one about the dahlias. There was no post on social media. There was no way.
HR
From: Claire Voss
To: m.hale.1993@gmail.com
Subject: RE: RE: just checking
Date: November 4, 2023
Who is this.
HR
From: m.hale.1993@gmail.com
To: Claire Voss
Subject: RE: RE: RE: just checking
Date: November 4, 2023 — 12:03 AM
You know who this is. You've always been able to tell. That's why you emailed this address and not any of the others you thought about emailing.
I remember the summer we were eleven and we stayed up all night in the Pattersons' treehouse and you told me you were afraid of forgetting things. That your biggest fear was that everything would just dissolve. Do you remember what I said?
I said: I'll remember for both of us.
I'm still doing that.
M
HR
From: Claire Voss
To: m.hale.1993@gmail.com
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: just checking
Date: November 4, 2023
How. How are you writing these. How is this possible.
HR
From: m.hale.1993@gmail.com
To: Claire Voss
Subject: RE: RE: RE: RE: RE: just checking
Date: November 4, 2023 — 12:11 AM
It's harder to explain than I thought it would be. I have thought about how I would explain it, and the explanation keeps coming out wrong because the words belong to the other side and over here they don't apply cleanly.
The closest I can get: I'm not gone. I'm just further away than I was. The distance makes things blurry but not invisible. I can still see you. I can see your mother's garden. I can see the photograph you keep in the drawer in your bedside table, the one you took out last month and cried over. The one from the lake.
Please don't cry over that photograph, Claire. I'm not worth the distance.
M
HR
The correspondence continued for three weeks. Claire Voss printed every email. The final email in the thread arrived on November 28th, and reads in its entirety:
"Something is changing. It's getting harder to reach. I want you to know that the things I told you are true and the things I remembered are accurate and I am sorry for the six years and I am sorry for leaving and I love you the same amount I always did which was more than you knew. Please don't write back to this address after tonight. I don't know what will answer."
Claire Voss wrote back that night. She has not received a response.
The account m.hale.1993@gmail.com was checked by Google's trust and safety team at police request. It had been inactive since March 2017. There was no record of the November emails being sent from any device or server.
There was no record of them at all.
They were in Claire's inbox. Read, re-read, printed, documented. Not on Google's servers. Not traceable. Not explainable.
Just there.